Points Of Light, When I Look back on my life, I scan a very uneven playing field. I see my beginning marked in ugly darkness that would always try to hold me back by not allowing light, color and beauty in my life. The thing is, when we finally get to the point when we can stop looking at ourselves and our dark circumstances, that's when we can begin to see tiny fragments of light, those little beams that help us see all kinds of wonderful, beautiful colors.
A.W. Tozer called this faith and said it like this, " Like the eye which sees everything in front of it and never sees itself, faith is occupied with the Object upon which it rests and pays no attention to itself at all." Hard? Well, okay it's not easy except to say it. But it's something to think about, right? I'm asking you to think about it, please.
Darkness Never Overcomes Light
Humiliation, anger, brutality, intimidation, no I didn’t come to her in the usual way. Once I thought she could have spared herself so much grief had she only distinguished this life that grew inside her. After all thought I, what was I but an albatross, or a burden, or a cross to bear? How my presence must have quickened up at least some resentment in her, so be it and amen, after all I didn’t come to her in the usual way of a love that’s tender and true. Still, she had me anyway!
What would a life lived without a me chained by her side been like? She’ll never know how that would have felt, because she had me anyway. Time can heal past hurts, and after all, I was a precocious little boy, cute and adorable, how could she turn a blind eye. She felt she would learn to love me just the same.
Still, she needed love in her life. She needed someone to love her, to listen to her, to show her security and make her feel desired. So she found him, and in finding him sometimes she lost her way, sometimes she lost me on that way, still, she would never leave me behind as she loved me just the same.
Then came the day I walked the sidewalk and noticed a beautiful sky of azure blue, sunshine bright, clouds so white, breeze just right and a peace came over me. I knew in an instant to breathe was not just a privilege but my right as a person. Suddenly I thought of David and his words rang clear and so very true -
“You have searched me, Lord, and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue you, Lord, know it completely. You hem me in behind and before, and you lay your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain. Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast. If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,” even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you. For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. How precious to me are your thoughts, God! How vast is the sum of them! Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand — when I awake, I am still with you”.
What may have seemed so very dark was done in light, and she would have me in anyway.
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