Light In The Smoke Of A Past Life

Points Of Light, on November the 20th of 2019, when I heard this song for the first time, I couldn't help but think about a book that could have been written about my own past lived life. That book would tell a tale to it's reader about a past I spent in deep emotional pain while I felt surrounded by what I believed was pitch-black darkness.

---

But I also thought about how I've spent a lifetime writing little story's to find light in the very midst of all that darkness. Then I remembered my post, "Sometimes We Find Beautiful Light In Thoughts", where I wrote this to share with you how "Sometimes it takes looking at what's going on in my life, the thing that seems to be a negative, maybe is a negative, bad, wrong, and bothering me, then paint myself a visual picture of that thing while I build a narrative around it, telling it as a story that can go a different, new, and better way." In those words I want us all to understand that as we find our way through our emotional pain, we can eventually find a place where we can leave all that pain behind. I've always accomplished this by finding a place in my heart where I see even tiny fragments of light and using that lights colors to paint beautiful word paintings so I could find happiness in my life lived. When I've done this, I've found it always helped put a smile on my face.

Points Of Light, this song is suggesting that that book about my past lived life, that I can rip out it's pages, page by page, and along with its binding, I can burn it! In doing that, all that past becomes no more than smoke that goes away as if it's being blown away in the wind! As I listened to this song, I heard a story's narrative being written in light with it's own colors, telling me it's own beautiful story that sort of mimics my life. The thing is, there may have been that book of Tod's past lived life full of pain and darkness, but I've chosen to tear out its pages to burn them along with its binding in a fire, and yeah, I watched as the wind blew away all my life's crap just like it was no more than smoke being blown away in the wind. Now, just like I said, I can write my life's story with a narrative that has a new and better outcome, and Points Of Light, I want to strongly suggest you can do the same no matter where you are in your own life lived.

I'm actually doing a poor job at representing my heart to you, that and how this song is speaking to me as it concerns our blog and each one of us as Points Of Light. Perhaps I should let the song speak for itself -

Smoke by Ben Folds

leaf by leaf and page by page throw this book away

and all the sadness all the rage throw this book away

rip out the binding and tear the glue and all of the grief we never even knew we had it all along now it's... smoke

the things we've written in it never really happened

all the things we've written in it never really happened

and all of the people come and gone never really lived

and all the people come have gone

no one to forgive smoke

we will not write a new one there will never be a new one another one another one

here's an evening dark with shame (throw it on the fire)

here's the time I took the blame (throw it on the fire)

here is the time we didn't speak, it seemed for years and years and here's the secret no one will ever know the reasons for the tears they are... smoke smoke smoke

we will not write a new one

there will never be a new one another one another one

where do all the secrets live? they travel in the air you can smell them when they burn they travel

those who say the past is not dead stop and smell the smoke

you keep saying the past is not dead, well, stop and smell the smoke

you keep on saying the past is not even past, and you keep saying we are... smoke smoke smoke